Dear Ones –
Some of you may have seen this story circulating the Inter-verse lately, but I had to share it here, because it's so wonderful, and so powerful.
This young woman was dumped by her fiancé a week before her wedding. Instead of retreating into despair and shame, she asked her friends and family to show up on what was supposed to have been her wedding day, anyhow. They all got dressed up and helped her to…well…make some major alterations to her wedding gown!
The results are beautiful and memorable, as you can see.
What I see in these photos is a young woman who refuses to rescind ownership over her own story in any way. I see a young woman who won't play the victim. I see a young woman who is stubbornly holding autonomy over her own life. I see a young woman who is calling upon her creativity and her dignity, in order to make peace from the pieces…and who (wisely) decided not to do it alone.
I've talked on this page many times about the importance of ceremony and ritual, in order to mark the most critical transitions of our personal stories. Ceremonies are intended to carry you safely through your changes (happy or sad, welcome or tragic) and to make sure that you don't get lost between one chapter of your life and the next.
If you skip the ceremony, sometimes it's difficult to safely process the transformation.
I believe that when society doesn't have an established ceremony in place for what you need — for the transition that you are facing — then you are TOTALLY allowed to make up a ceremony of your own.
Weddings are important ceremonies, with a deep tradition behind them. But there's no ceremony in place for how to get over being dumped a week before your wedding. So what this young woman did here? THAT'S how you create a homemade ritual, when you need one. That's how you bring meaning and light back into your world when nothing makes sense anymore. That's how you safely cross over to the next chapter.
That's how you say: ONWARD!
I bow down to her. She's awesome.
Heart,
LG
I got left at the altar: turning heartbreak into artwork
offbeatbride.com
As the day that was supposed to be my wedding day approached, none of us knew what to do, think or feel. I knew that a pity party was the farthest thing from what I wanted or needed. A few people b…